My personal beliefs (I apologize in advance because I have them)

My dearest laddies,

I am dying. And as much as I can already hear you saying "no you aren't" and "you douche" believe me when I say that I am dying; because odds are, you are dying too.

I stood home today, just like every other day I guess, and I watched The Bucket List, with Morgan Freedman and Jack Nicholson. It was a good movie, if you like those types of movies about making a difference in one's life and blah, blah, blah. Anyway, it got me thinking. Maybe I should write a "bucket list?" I mean, it's like a list of your goals in life (at least all the ones you want to get down before you "kick the bucket.") and it should be interesting. Anyway, I decided to write one, yet I don't have much:

• See Times Square pitch black (currently working on this)
• Go on a safari through the Congo (if it still exists after Global Warming)
• Visit the Amazon (if it still exists)
• Go to Australia, India, Thailand, Japan, China, Italy, France, England, Scotland, Ireland, Spain, Brazil, Argentina, The Bahamas, Mexico, Egypt...Canada (I just need to get out of this country!)
• Visit Sydney (the city), The Taj Mahal, Tokyo, The Great Wall of China, Florence, Venice, Rome (esp. The Coliseum), Paris, The Alps, London, Edinburg, Dublin, Barcelona, Madrid, Rio, Buenos Ares, The Mayan ruins, the Great Pyramids of Giza...CANADA!
• Produce a movie in which I directed, produced, written, acted, filmed, hand picked the musical score, chosen the actors, etc (like a one man show)
• Win a notable award (a Grammy, Emmy, Oscar, NY Times Bestseller, Noble Prize, a damn neon orange Nickelodeon Blimp...)
• Go white water rafting
• Swim with dolphins (if they still exist...due to crazy Japanese fishermen, who don't realize that humans aren't meant to eat dolphin meat.)
• Visit Sesame Street
• Witness a severe natural disaster (a volcano eruption, a category 5 hurricane, a tornado, an earthquake, a tsunami...) and live
• Crash one of Ellen Degeneres' birthday parties
• Befriend a pack of wolves
• Live in The White House AND Buckingham Palace
• Become (somehow) CEO and owner of Viacom (cause Viacom owns many peoples' souls and so I can pay for everything I'll do listed above)

On a brighter note, I have a personal vendetta against plastic tupperware. I don't know why, I just find tupperware completely disgusting. I mean, have you ever noticed how plastic tupperware becomes discolored after you but a certain food into it (like cooked beans or meat sauce) and when you try to scrub off the coloring you can't because it's embedded itself into the plastic? Isn't that disgusting?